Sunday Swimming

The next few comments may be a little offensive to some. So before I dive into this post, I'm writing a brief disclaimer  First of all, I LOVE children. One of the main reasons that I do what I do is to bring magic back into the lives of children. But that doesn't mean that all the ones I come in contact with are well behaved. So that's what this post will be about, as the last human child I met was an absolute brat. Enough said. Brat with a capital B.

Whenever I come across these kinds of children, I have to act carefully. Regardless of what they say or believe, I'm not about to break character or break the magic, especially since other children are usually present. That being said, I also have to create boundaries. Often to prove their point kids will pull/kick/hit my tail which is not okay for two reasons. First, it's inappropriate for any kid to physically hit me. You wouldn't hit an adult, you wouldn't hit Mickey Mouse at Disneyland, and I'm no different. Even though my tail is "fake" it's not an appropriate course of action. Second, my "costume" is VERY expensive. It's okay for them to touch the fluke, but it's not okay for them to destroy it. Since there are fabric elements, and delicate sequins and shells attached, if a child hits/pulls/kicks the tail they can cause damage that will need to be repaired, and that's not okay.Especially since their parents have no intentions on replacing the tail or paying for repairs. I have gotten very good at putting on my kind, but stern, "teacher voice". I tell the kids that it is NOT okay for them to do that, that it hurts me, that my tail is part of my body, etc. And then usually I swim away and refuse to pay them any more attention until they behave. Sometimes that scares them into being good, and sometimes they leave me alone. Either way its a win-win, and I never break character.

Often, kids will follow me around the pool. Sometimes it's extremely frustrating because the parent(s) are nowhere to be found. There was a sign in the locker room that said, "Please monitor your children at all times. Lifeguards are not babysitters." I think the sign should have read, "Please monitor your children at all times. Mermaids are not lifeguards." That's how it feels most of the time I am at the pool. These kids are often not monitored by their guardians, which leads to the problems above with the hitting/kicking/pulling of my tail.

On Sunday I went to the pool with Koral. We ran into one little girl in particular that was a spoiled brat. She would demand that we do tricks, show her how our tails worked, etc. She would then claim that we weren't real, pull on our tails (she pulled a couple of sequins off mine), and demand things out of us. Meanwhile telling us we are liars, and she was going to tell her mom. (Like her mother grounding us is really a concern.) Her threats were, "Show me a trick, or I will be sassy" or "I'm going to tell my mom you wouldn't do tricks for me". I said, "If you can't be nice, I'm not going to show you a trick. I only do tricks for nice children." What I was THINKING was, "Look you little shit, I'm not here for your entertainment right now. Where in the hell are your parents? If you pull on my tail one more time, I'm going to take it off and smack you with it."

Once we decided to get out of the pool we couldn't remove our tails poolside, because the above mentioned Brat wouldn't leave us alone. (Seriously, where in the hell is her mother?!) So we decided to prove our point, that we would scoot into the locker room, and remove our tails behind the shower curtain and walls. What a sight for sore eyes! Here are two mermaids, army crawling and butt scooting from the shallow water into the locker room that's about 20 feet away. We're slipping on the tiles, wrestling with our bags and towels, while trying to open the locker room door. Out of water, mermaids are the most ungraceful floppy things in the world. At least we made it, and the Brat left us alone to change and shower in peace.